Sex Tips for Women
1. Drunk sex is not better than no sex. There’s always the morning.
2. Dirty talk is completely necessary. Please tell us you like our bodies. You don’t need to exaggerate – we realise it’s not just like hopping on top of Dirk’s giant Diggler – but do flatter.
3. If you like it rough, tell us up front – in fact, preferably in the pub earlier. We’re not going to try even an unsolicited tug of the hair, not in today’s ‘PC gone mad’ climate.
4. If we shave our pubes, it’s because we think you like it. OK FINE, it’s because we want it to look bigger. Happy now? Give us a break. You started the ‘does size matter?’ debate, and never even had the common decency to answer your own question.
5. Oral sex is not a trade off, or a perennial game of one-upmanship. Don’t do it to get it, or assume that’s what we’re doing. We’re not. We’re trying to turn you on. In fact, remember that last bit – because it’s essentially true of most blokes. Bear it in mind before you get all high and mighty about how shit we are.
9Apps 4.9
